Sunday, June 24, 2012

When the burning still continues

I want to hurt you for being so bratty
I lift up your pretty dress
Pull your best panties down
Stare at your swollen cunt
Pull you over my knee
Pinch and SPANK!

I want to hurt you for being so cute
I tease that wet pussy
Wipe fingers on your buttocks
Push you on all fours
Everything exposed
Scratch and SLAP!

I want to hurt you for trying to forget
That time I consumed you
When nothing else mattered
But me overpowering you
And your lust for my pain
Bang and THUD!

I want to hurt you for being so naughty
That urge to feel young
Wanting to be dirty
Your bum raised to me
I raise my cane
Whoosh and WHACK!

I want to hurt you for your cheeky eyes
I grab your pert breasts
Dig my nasty nails in
Pull at your nipples
Bite your pretty neck
Pull and SUCK!

I want to hurt you for that juice trickling
Down your swollen cunt
I breath in your smell
I raise my crop high
Your bum quivers

I want to hurt you for consuming my mind
I flip you on your back
Face between my legs
Hair in your nose
Lips in your mouth

I want to hurt you for nearly drowning
In my acrid juices
Tears wet on your cheeks
Bottom so sore
My fingers fill you
Push, push, WHAM!

I want to hurt you because your dirty
My stiff raised hand
Whacking your button
Your juices splatter
My mouth on your nipple
Suck and BITE!

I want to hurt you because you love it
Holster on
My cock in place
Shoved in your mouth
Then sliding between labia
Push and WHAM!

I want to fill you so you don't forget
I thrust you hard
Your cunt envelopes
Your mind fills with me
You so small, me so big
Together in ECSTASY!

I want to cuddle you warm and hard
For being a good girl
For sucking my breast
As we lie together
And melt away
Time standing still

So hard to go back
To our usual selves
Our usual lives
Our usual roles
When the burning still continues ...

Sunday, June 17, 2012


In bed, wet morning
Snuggled deep
Into warm flesh
So safe and loved
And relaxed

Breakfast, coffee, laptop
Warm bed
Trees, birds, rain outside
And you beside me
Sleeping peacefully
Cuddle into my hip
Smiling, breathing
Loved and in love


Saturday, June 16, 2012

She is there in front of me ...

She is there in front of me
Her back faces me
Arms over the spanking horse limp
Legs trying to part
But cautiously closing
Her feet placed firmly
The foundation that will keep her grounded
In what is to come
Her body trying so very hard to relax
And prepare
For what is about to come

I drag my nails along her soft back
From neck to buttock
Down the legs and up
In between
Around the buttocks
Her energy opens and flows
Up to me

A harsh spank awakens her from the spell
We are not here just for sensation
My pretty
The excitement and fear
Fills my nostrils
And enters my mouth
For me to taste
And breath in deep
A primeval channel is opened

The music changes
I am away
The music bounces me along
In this dance of light, love and pain
Spanking, pounding, patting, stroking, cropping
So intoxicating
Yet I am in tune with every breath and movement
From her

My movements are enchanted by our rhythms and the music
And the infliction of glorious pain
Watching her flinch at that one
Easing her back down with this one
Bringing her back up with that one
Let her spin and drift with this one
Only to be drawn back out with that one
Waves of pain and love and sexuality
And that deep deep feeling that is indescribable
But only those in the dance of pain know
So well
Yet can never quite put their finger on it
Long enough
To speak those unspoken words

Then we arrive at the cane
The true love of my life
Cane never lets me down
It's beauty intoxicates me
Mesmerises me
And fills me
In these moments
The universe and I are one

I dance with five canes and the bodies I find
These moments
Are my happiest
These moments
A savage power fulfills me
It flows through me
Thrilling me
Repelenishing me
Loving me
And her

How many will she take
Which ones will she like the most
How far can we go
In this dance of pain and love and light?

I caress her with the cane
Massage her
Let it bounce on her beautifully rounded buttocks
I tap her on her back
When she is sinking into it
I give her a whack
Remember my pretty
This is about pain
As well as sensation
Good girl, you are doing well

It comes in waves up and down
Soft and hard
As I weave my cane spell
Her bottom sinks in
Her legs quiver
Her hands grasp
They then collapse
As she goes through that barrier
To that special place
I ease the strokes and remind her
To bring that bottom back out
For me
To hit it again and again

We dance the cane dance
Time stands still
The room blurs
Yet part of me knows where we are
By where we are in the music
And part of me is forever watching her
And me

Five canes are used
I slide back and forth
Between them
Stamina is needed
For her to take the wangees
And so we revisit the school cane
I slide from pure evil animal
To seductress in pain and sensation

And the disciplinary cane bounces
Loud and proud as it struts
Along her body
It is so long I can observe her pretty face
Such beauty in her hard work
Taking it and loving it and hating it

There are moments when her sexy body is frozen
She has gone from here to the other world
Then she comes back with such beautiful fear and pain
And even tears
She will never be the same
She has visited that world I once knew

I lighten the whacks and build the intensity
This is it
I have taken control of her body
It builds and builds and she cannot control it
Just be
Little one - just be
She allows it to sweep over her
She comes in wonder and ecstasy
All through it the glorious pain leaching into every pour
It rolls off her and up her body in to mine
It hits me so hard and washes over me
Flowing into my clit
And drawing at my face
We both quiver and shake
And smile

We collapse in smiles and giggles and hugs
I re position her
My hands and nails flow over her body
I soothe her and remind her
Of the painful bits
Of our play
Nails stroke her
She smiles
Nails dig into her
She gasps
Hands massage her
She purrs
Hands stoke her
She floats
Mouth kisses her relaxed body
Then I sink my teeth in biting her hard
Sucking her life force
She is frozen in pain and pleasure
I then drop her down
To float and dream
As I stroke her
Before I bring her back to
The here and now

Thank you

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Genital Torture and Me

I was recently inspired by a collection of CBT photos in fetlife. One in particular was a guy in latex chaps with his penis bound in front of him with a humbler to propel it up and the head was a globe of needles. It looked spectacular. Like something you would see in an art gallery. I find work like that very inspirational. To take some body parts that are usually seen as something else and turn them into a work of art really gives me a thrill. It is doubly so if it involves that person going through a process of pain. Having them submit their body in a session (especially a vulnerable part), watching them process that pain, feeling their energy as they do this and all the time I am playing with a tender part of their anatomy changing it into some thing humourous, artistic, horrifying, sweet, beautiful, pretty - whatever takes my fancy at the time.

Before it was cock and balls, now I have ventured out into labia, urethra, vagina. Any worry about projection I once had was processed in the first session. My dominant/sadist side came through and I did not think about this being done to me, but fully focused on what needed to be done - implements and body parts, as well as soothing and reassuring the brave receptor of the pain.

I really miss cock and ball torture. Finding a regular suitable play partner seems impossible presently. Not only do I love the sensations and thoughts as above, but I also love taking the great phallic symbol that has been worshiped as the be all and end all of huMANity and reducing it to something else. It is not a hatred of man, but a subversion of patriarchy. It is done with humour and love. Not maliciousness and hatred. I am sure some people miss this point.

I do not hate men, I love many of them and are meh about a lot of them. Some annoy the fuck out of me, but I do not hate them. I just think society has taken them way too seriously and put major expectations on them for far too long. Taking the phallic symbol and subverting it is a work of art in itself and one I wish to share with the world, but a lot of the world just projects themselves or those they care about in to the picture and does not get it at all.

People are so hung up over genitals and so hung up over blood. Blood is beautiful, and ancient, and sexy, our life essence therefore it is sacred and needs to be expressed not always contained in the vessels we call bodies. Genitals are subjective and are at the mercy of the situation they are placed in. This paragraph will be explored further later.

When I used to do CBT on trev all of the above was happening, but also love was there between us. I not only admired him for always taking on the challenge and turning it into pleasure, but I loved inflicting the pain and seeing him take it with love and grace and moving it into something he could enjoy - such a clever masochist. I would love to reward him afterwards with my body for him to pleasure and for me to pleasure his. His greatest reward was to see me delighted in what I was doing to him and then seeing me blissed out at what he was doing to me. I know that all helped him to take the challenge and I know that is why it is so hard to find a play partner now.

Now I love someone who does not have the pleasure response to cbt, therefore my cbt work is about respect and care for the one going through the pain and the pure sadistic pleasure of doing it, married with the fun or creating something new with the traditional cock and balls. These new play partners are not rewarded with my body and therefore it is harder to find one that fits with me. Their reward needs to be moving much further in their own personal journey of pleasure, endurance and pain. They need to enjoy it in some way. My love comes to them as a fellow human being helping them and enjoying them, but not as something sexual.

Do I ever think about the men that have raped me when I do cbt? No I really don't.

When I am doing my sadistic work on any part of the body I am thinking of that person and what is happening between us not my past. I do not play with people I do not feel good with. That is a risk I am not prepared to take and not something I can enjoy. I am not a bitch domme I am a nurturer. Even when I push people to go places they do not think they can go it is as a nurturer as well as a sadist. I don't do things to people that I think will hurt them emotionally or psychologically. That goes against my beliefs. If others wish to do that then so be it, but it is not for me.

CBT for me is about artistry, humour, endurance, energy, subversion, golden moments and love.

Sunday, June 3, 2012

How do you start?

Below is a reply to someone that was frustrated with not being able to start on his dominant journey because no sub that he approached was willing to give him a go, because he did not have the experience. He had no profile. There were two replies before mine.

They need to know some things about you before being interested. Therefore a well written profile is a must. You may want to change your name as well. It sounds more like a pushy sub's name, than a dominant [Cunt Connoisseur] . There is nothing wrong with a dominant who enjoys pussy and lots of it, but to base first impressions on this they may think you are just after sex. 

In my experience starting at the bottom and moving to the top makes the best dominant, or at least trying it out a few times to understand the D/s dynamic and what it is like to receive and process pain. You can understand your prospective subs a lot better that way. If you have brought up children then you already have experience of guiding people in life.

People are more likely to give a new dominant a go if they know them. That means getting yourself out there. Munches, parties, events and contributing to discussions in here. Find groups that interest you and ones that are local to your area as well. This is a time to learn as much as you can so that it comes out in conversations and messages. Do not pretend to know it through experience, but someone who does their homework leaves a good impression for a sub to take a chance.

I always recommend the real stuff not online, that is munches and events seeing someone's body language and how they act and talk if so much easier and safer than spending a long time online only to find that it is a bad match. Seeing that guy from the munch at events and then finally chatting with him and realizing you feel comfortable with him is a much more secure way for a sub to give him a go.

Remember that it is unlikely that one of your first playmates will be 'the one', so do not be too picky. Some one that is clean, friendly and is not going to blurt out your life story to the world is enough for some experimental work. A sub who is experienced and willing to assist you to learn is even better.

I am well known for being a good S/m dominant in my area. I started as a switch, then a sub and then back to a switch before progressing to a dominant. I was active in the local scenes as well as local yahoo and then fetlife groups. I joined a committee for local group that held workshops and events that gave me knowledge and credence in the community. People know who I am and know I have too much to loose by being unsafe or scary. They are therefore willing to play with me.

My playing experience has come from being a sub who could take a lot of pain, who experienced a lot on the bottom, and who experienced a lot of casual play as well as some long term bonding. I know pain inside and out and I know what it is like to be sub as well as a play bottom. I was blessed to have learned how to dominate with a sub who had 20 years experience under his belt. He was not pretty, he was a lot older than me and it was meant to be a play only relationship. That developed into a very intense loving S/m relationship. He has since passed over, but I have him to thank for being the strong, confident, experienced dominant that is writing to you now.

Good luck on your journey.

WW ;-)

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Age: Judgement, relationships, and BDSM

Written in response to a thread asking about judging people by their age and how age affects relationships.


My sub is 23 and I am 48. A few years back I would not have conceived having a partner that young, but there you are circumstances led us together and it has worked incredibly well. Because he is not much older than my children I can relate to him reasonably well. I am very in touch with his generation through my children. My kids and I had a close relationship when we lived together. I was the cool Mum that their friends talked easily to and I helped them with problems that their parents would not handle well. We had the fun parties where there were no dramas, etc. My sub is much more mature than my kids. I think that comes from gaming and chatting with people of many ages on the internet for years before he met me and stepped back into the real world. He can talk well with people of all ages. The only time I feel old with his generation is when people talk gaming, because my idea of games is frogger, cards and monopoly!

I was sub to a man 26 years my senior and that worked well for a time. There was a big difference in perspectives, but the age difference worked for our dynamic. It was something else that destroyed the relationship. I had a sub 15 years older than me and that worked really well. He was young at heart, but lucky for me, as a new dominant at the time, very experienced in BDSM. The difference in age rarely was a problem.

One of my regular playmates is the same age as my daughter. But she is much more mature than her. I have decided to draw the line at the age. Again I would have thought too young, but I took her under my wing when she was a newbie, because I thought it better to play with someone who would look after her. She has played with lots of people, but has come back to playing mainly with my sub and I. We do not have a sexual relationship though.

Another regular playmate is in his 50s and I used to play with his Master also in his 50s. They both do not seem older than me.

Age in general:

Age is more than a number. It is an interesting characteristic about a person. You are a product of your generation whether you like it or not. You share some experiences with people your own age bracket, even if you are mostly very different to them. I notice each generation has certain characteristics, but other than that it is no barrier.

I think in the BDSM community age is far less of a barrier than in most communities. We all share something in common that we only get to talk about with each other. That is what binds us. Because it is of such a personal and often hidden part of our identity it breaks down many barriers - not just age. Barriers such as class, ethnicity, spiritual beliefs, sexual orientations, family cultures, career structures are put aside so that we can mingle and play and 'just be' without the outside world interfering.

However, for myself I do not comment much on fet photos younger than my sub. If I do it is more encouraging and admiring than of a sexual nature. I do not want to be too much of a dirty old lady - if it is not ok for men then I have to go by my principles and be the same. When it comes to playing with people, age rarely comes into it if they are older than my children. I expect as my children get older that will change, but generally I prefer playmates to be 21 and over. I have played with men in their 70s. As long as their health is ok and I click with them there is not a problem.

I was a stoner in my past and that too was a common ground that brought people together from all ages. Therefore I have always mixed with a variety of ages. As far as judging people by their age. I like to get to know them to figure out their maturity. I think most people would pass some judgement when they see a person before they get to know them, for example renting a property when you are in your teens you do have to make an effort to show that you are mature enough to be a good tenant.  It is much easier for me to rent places now than when I was younger. I am often judged in the vanilla world as being too old to hang out with young people and in general not eye candy to men of any generation, whereas in the BDSM world we are a bit more cerebral than that. They have no idea what I do with young people! I particularly noticed it when I went to erotica/sexpo.

When I am working with young people I notice that they respect me more than my younger co-workers, so that is an advantage. I presume it is the Mum thing. It is funny because I am the one with the unusual haircuts, piercings and musical tastes compared to my conservative young co-workers.

So age is more than a number, it is an interesting characteristic. I consider it less of a barrier in the BDSM world than the vanilla world and for me we are all just people with a variety of interesting characteristics, age being just one of them. I am very happy with my young sub  :-)

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Super beings

Sometimes super beings are just human beings
Sometimes it is hard for them to even get off the couch and hang out the washing let alone save the world

Sometimes super beings are just human beings
Sometimes they have feelings just like you and needing a hug, or advice, or answers to their messages

Sometimes super beings are just human beings
They do not have all the answers for everyone or even themselves, sometimes they too feel the impossibility of life

Sometimes super beings are just human beings
They need to draw power from others rather than giving their power away; saving the world is a tiring business at times

Sometimes super beings are just human beings
Sometimes they wish they too could be destructive and not be a rolemodel and sometimes ...
they even cry!

Sometimes super beings are just human beings they need to unleash pain upon themselves see their own blood flow to know that they too are alive ...............

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

A journey of altered consciousness

'The kind of pain that works best as a tool of altered states is not the sort that is necessarily best for killing someone, or immobilising an enemy. To work properly, it should be sustained at the same level for a long period of time, or be adjustable as needed. It should not cause too much in the way of physical damage, because that might make you pass out and miss the entire experience. It's carefully controlled, carefully orchestrated pain, not random flailing, and the best way to work with it is to do it slowly and with attention to the reactions of one's body. This isn't just about safety ... It's that if things go wrong, you will lose the thread of altered consciousness that takes you There, wherever There is' - Raven Kaldera - Dark Moon Rising: Pagan BDSM and the Ordeal Path.

With exception to the bit about going slow I can really relate to this statement. Yes a slow build up, but I am often fast in my movement with impact play as well as slow and the many degrees in between.  However what I am interested in is the altered consciousness that is called subspace. If one is to go deep into it, is it similar to the journeys of ancient cultures? The above book, that was given to me by the lovely Chilli_gal, and a recent experience made me ponder over the BDSM style that I have developed and my personal philosophy on sadism that has been developing over the years.

Kaldera works from a pagan perspective and therefore there is a lot of stuff about gods and pagan belief systems that I find hard to read in his book, but the principles of the Ordeal Path that ancient and some current non Christian based societal groups were/are practicing is something that I can relate to for personal growth through pain. Actually some earlier Christians were also into it such as the flagellates.

I absolutely think each to their own, whatever floats each other’s boats. I love that tops take so many different approaches etc, etc, but I have worked out what works for ME; and there seems to be a large number of playmates that enjoy what I do, so I am not alone in this. Some have even noticed a shift in their energy and an ability to do things that they could not do before. If the bottoms wish to consider my S/m play as just a bit of fun then that is great. However, if they wish to feel they are in touch with something deeper inside or outside of themselves through pain then that is even better.

I love taking people on journeys through pain. It does not have to go deep, but I certainly would like to explore that side with some. Through my actions I like to guide them along a path. I may jolt them a little when it feels right, but I do not like to jolt them out of subspace, because all that work we have just been through needs to start again if we are to reach a pain that they are truly capable of tolerating.

When I was a sub I knew that BDSM could be a journey of personal growth, but also each play is like a journey within itself. Perhaps it was similar to taking a trip on acid in the 70s (when the acid was good!) or peyote in the dessert, or skewering your mouth or back in a religious ritual, or flagellation in medieval times.  When I subbed to my ex-dom I often would go deep into sub space. It would be like a meditative journey. One in which I once even visualised something that I would not see until the following week. I would go into this landscape that seemed so real, but if I tried to question where I was and what I was doing there I would be pulled back into consciousness. It is with this understanding of the altered consciousness that I approach my sadism.

I want to take people on journeys into an altered consciousness, i.e. subspace. So far I have only played with a few people that I feel are ready  to go as far as I went myself, but I think there are many with such potential and a few that can go much further if they allow me – and most importantly allow themselves to go ‘there’. I think this is why I am not interested in the D/s thing when playing in an S/m way. I am their guide more than their dominator. The domination is just to set the scene, keep them in the space and for them to focus on my voice when necessary.

I consider it is a matter of not thinking, but feeling and then pushing through the pain barrier to float on the other side. To explore the other side without interference from your conscious self – and that is where trust is so important, otherwise you are still going back and forth and not able to explore. To let go and believe the top will guide you right is a big leap of faith, or in my case as a new sub it was my dominant putting me into a comfy position after play and allowing me to drift without interruption until I was ready to come out of it.

I am no pagan and as I said above what I have read and heard so far regarding the ordeal path is a bit off putting for me personally – but power to the people that it fits well with. My belief system is actually based in my contact with spiritualists a few years ago. Then I developed my own spiritual journey through meditation and the information that found me rather than I have found it.  It was a matter of just knowing what to do and believing in me and those that guide me. I think the dear old mediums at the spiritualist church would probably not agree with me mixing BDSM with spiritualism, but when they reach the other side they may change their minds.  It is just that they are not here for that reason, whereas I am increasingly aware that one of the reasons I am here and now is for that reason. I think it is in line with the pagan ordeal journey that Kaldera writes about – but for me there are no entities, just energies and guides.

For me it was a process of coming to the understanding that the modern world has left the sexual and recreational pain in a special bad/sacred box and therefore erotic and/or enjoyable pain is just wrong. To combine it with a spiritual journey seems sacrilege to many puritans, yet what I and many others are doing, whether it involves the sexual or not, is touching on areas of the body and mind that others consider dirty or weird or ‘just not right’.

At the same time for many in the BDSM community to use all that fun stuff in a spiritual way also is ‘just not right’, but I think anyone working with energy may have some understanding of what I am talking about on both sides of the fence. It is in working with the energy that is between and within the people in S/m sessions and remembering my own personal journeys as a bottom that I have gained insight into where I want to take my sadism and where I want to take my playmates.

I feel that it is perfectly natural to get a thrill in your head and/or in your genitals from giving and receiving pain. To match this up with a spiritual journey seems a natural thing to do. If the word spiritual does not fit well with you then please name that journey something that suits you (just as I have chosen to skim over Raven Kaldera’s rituals and gods). Make it your own!

I started writing this lengthy entry to process my thoughts and feelings on my style of play compared to others and the book I was reading about spiritual journeys through BDSM. Not only am I enjoying evil sadistic fun, but I love nurturing and guiding people on their journey through Sadomasochism and subspace.   

I recognise that some do not understand it or wish to understand it and others do not believe in it. I also understand that some tops enjoy pulling people out of subspace to increase their pain and make it more difficult for them. However, I believe that a person can go much further on their pain journey in the present and into the future if they are allowed to work through subspace in a session – not be pulled out of it just as they are sinking into it. It is a case of different strokes for different folks, but for me the content and floaty looks on people’s faces after playing with them is equally a reward as the fun of inflicting my pain upon to them.

Enjoy the trip!

WW ;-)  

Monday, March 5, 2012

Hand strapping

Hand strapping. I don’t know what it is about hand strapping, but it is really hot and brings out the young naughty little masochist in me. It is something that is really only suited to be dished out by certain people to make it feel ‘right. To date I have not felt the right vibe to do it someone else you very often.

I used to be dommed by an older English styled dominant of the old spanko variety. He brought out a naughty young lady character from my inner depths. I tried to deny this feeling/character, but it/she was often there when we played and she often would sit between us when we were alone. She certainly immerged when I was standing to attention legs together, hands at my sides head bowed or looking directly ahead ready to present my hands palm upwards for a hand strapping. I was usually in a suspender belt and stockings, perhaps some lingerie, but often nothing else. Not exactly school girl or Victorian ward attire, but there was a feel of that age in such a scene even though it was never spoken. We did not need to create the scene to feel it.

I loved and hated hand strapping. I hated it because it hurt and I loved it because it hurt and gave me such a thrill. It was always hard to lift my hand up and offer it to him to strap. I knew what was coming and I hated the burning pain, it made me want to cry, but at the same time it brought me such intense pleasure emotionally and sexually. As my hand was burning from the pain my clit was glowing and a warm excited feeling would wind its way throughout my body.

Having to then present my other hand was so difficult to do. I knew what would happen, yet I longed for it. If there was any moment that I knew I was a masochist this was it! I would have to put my burning hand at my side, or on his cock that was hanging out of his trousers, as I then replaced the fresh hand waiting for the pain to come. Then of course I would have to present the first hand for another strapping when it was still sore. It was hard to do, yet I loved doing it for him and for me. Over and over I would repeat this until I could not take anymore. He would be stern, but amused at my behaviour. He knew he had a masochist on his hands and he liked to prove it to him and myself by me offering my hand even though I was in pain.

Those masochist days have long gone for me, but the memories are there and the hot feeling whenever I see a hand strapping. I am not that person anymore and cannot bottom to a character that would suit such a scene. However, sometimes I am a school girl or Victorian ward in my fantasies and the hand strapping makes an appearance.  

If I find the right person to suit such a scene I would love to strap their hand. Passing it on as it were.

Thursday, January 26, 2012


Pain in the BDSM sense is many things to me. As a bottom it was connected to challenging my body and mind as well as a turn on. I would cum from canes, single tails and nipple torture. It was also an amazing way to escape from my everyday life. It centred my body and mind. I do miss it.
Sex after or during a play session is usually awesome giving and receiving but for me it has to be with the right people. And 'the right people' seems to be getting more complex as I go along.
As a dominant giving pain also has many levels. I can do it as an educational thing for demos or for assisting people to understand with new stuff on their journey. My reward is the sense of passing it on to others, spreading the love that is BDSM.
Then there is my sadistical pleasure. As a few of you know given a willing and strong mind and healthy body mixed with a good rapport I would go to huge lengths of fun/horror in my sadism. There does not need to be sexual elements in it for me to be chuckling manically or getting a huge rush mentally and often sexually.
There is also playing with someone I am attracted to. I do not need to play particularly hard with them to get my rush, but the more intense the play the more I enjoy it.
I am currently looking for someone to do cbt with. I do not want to be sexually attracted to them. I want to do nasty and often funny things with their equipment. They need to enjoy this and not expect any form of sexual release in my presence. I want them to enjoy the cbt as a masochist with a sense of humour and challenge. They are most welcome to carry the experience away and do what they like with it afterwards. So that is another level. But because it will involve needles and electricity I have no takers yet.
I love it when two minds meet on the same S/m wavelength. I have only experienced this with three people on the giving end and one on the receiving end. We just link mind and body in glorious pain and it 'just works'. No point in unpacking it - just do it. It is like a game of how far we can go, a challenge of endurance and ecstasy.
I love taking people to their limit of endurance, pushing them further than they ever expected to go. To see them so blissful and exhausted at the end and me sailing on such a huge high myself. It gives me so much joy.
Pain is such an important part of my life - love it!